Anal Sex 101 for Beginners

anal sex 101

Does Anal Sex Hurt?

It can hurt. If you have never had anal sex before and your anus has never really been stretched or penetrated in that way, it can be painful. It can be uncomfortable and stretch your anus in ways you never knew about, but again, the key is to relax. Once you can relax those key muscles, the sky is the limit to your anal pleasure.

When you first start having anal sex, it will undoubtedly be uncomfortable or painful in certain moments, but that should fade away as you become more comfortable. Never be afraid to let your partner know if you need a break, more lube, or to shift in any way!

The pleasure can be incredible once you get comfortable and relaxed with anal sex. If you have a prostate, you might have a prostate orgasm that can give some people waves of full-body orgasm. 

People with and without prostates can get stimulated by the nerve endings within the anal canal. These can also give intense orgasms.

Safe ways to Anal Sex

safe ways to have anal sex

There is no “proper” way to have any sex. As long as it feels good, consensual, and both people enjoy it, it is proper. The safest way to have anal sex is to use lots of lube and a condom. It is also the safest when your anus is relaxed because the chance of tearing is significantly lowered. 

They say that the best lube to use is silicone lube because it is the thickest and most long-lasting lube. Unfortunately, if you want to do anal play with a silicone toy, the silicone lube will harm the toy. If you’re going to do anal play with lube AND toys, either put a condom over the toy or use water-based lube.

Additionally, never use numbing lubes for anal sex. Pain or discomfort are the best and only markers you have during anal sex to know whether you or your partner are hurting your bodies. Taking this tool away can be very harmful.

Hygiene Tips for Anal Sex

The recommended step before you have anal sex is to get a small mirror and look.

At your anus, see what’s going on down there, and understand your body better. It is also good to see what your anus looks like typically to tell when something irregular happens. You’re also going to want to go to the bathroom before you start. 

After you have anal sex, check in with your anus again and ensure you don’t see any irritation or redness. It can be pretty common to have some minor tearing or bleeding, but you should see a doctor if it is red and irritated. 

Be very clean and wash your hands or any toys you use. If you’re going to use your hands, be sure to cut your nails so they don’t get caught on anything.

Do Women like Anal Sex?

Women or people with vaginas like anal sex. As previously mentioned, this area contains many very tender nerve endings that can produce intense sensation and pleasure. 

People with vaginas are often much less acquainted with anal sex than people who like penises who like having sex with other people with penises. Knowledge is my power, my friends! Unlocking this whole element to your sex life can be incredibly empowering and fun!

Do Men like Anal Sex?

For men or people with penises, anal sex can be unique. Not only does being penetrated feel great because they can have prostate orgasms and also “a-spot” orgasms, but they also can be the ones penetrating. 

mens butt

Some men say that the anus can be tighter than the vagina to give more pleasure. Be careful with this, though. It’s unfair of a sexual partner to push you into anything you don’t want to do. Most people with penises say that anal is not much different from vaginal penetration. Anal sex is a type of sex that you have to want for it to feel good(especially on the receiving side), so don’t say yes if it’s not what you want!

It’s ok to have Anal Sex and move to Vaginal Sex?

Never directly put a penis that has been in the anus into a vagina. There are many bacteria in the anus that no one wants to be in their vagina. Doing that will give a UTI, yeast infection, or other vaginal infection. 

A great way to solve this problem is to get a new condom when moving into vaginal sex or to wear gloves if you are using your hands.

To wash the bacteria off, you would have to wash the penis off very aggressively and un-sexily. It’s best to air on the side of caution here and separate vaginal and anal sex somehow. If you are not using a condom, it’s best not to have vaginal sex right after anal sex.

Is Anal Sex Bad or Good for Your Health?

Anal sex can be bad for your health if you practice nonconsensual, unlubricated, and unhygienic.

LUBRICANT is vital here for pleasure and safety. If you don’t use lube, there won’t be a lubricant, and you can tear your anus in excruciating ways. 

Both partners need to prepare to keep everyone healthy in terms of hygiene. If you are doing it alone, the same thing goes. Cleanliness, condoms, and communication are crucial to safety. 

What are some anal sex techniques for pleasure?

Slow and steady wins the race. Start with your or your partner’s fingers plus a lot of lube. After that, move on to slow and steady penetration. Remember to breathe, let go and relax. 

Some great positions to do anally are:

  • Doggy Style
  • Cow Position
  • Facedown
  • Missionary 
  • Cowgirl

Read More:

What if my partner wants rough sex?

The Health benefits of Sex

Redefining Six Life-Long Benefits of Sexual Health for Individuals

15 Sex Position for Smaller Penis Owners

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